Wednesday, April 1, 2015

How do you respond to disappointment?

Well, I know it has been a long time...I must keep this blog up. Sorry for my distance. I seem to turn to this when things in my life start to unravel. I cling to this form of therapy when i feel discouraged or have some trial that hits my family or my career. This is one of those times again... I have loved the whole Kevin Pauls & Friends at Christmas time in Kitchener...this is starting to become a "thing", something people are looking forward to and I am hoping to actually not lose money this year!! LOL...But, I have always dreamed of Christmas & Easter...I wanted to make an impact in my community surrounding the 2 biggest days on the calendar...and the 2 biggest events in the history of the world (not trying to be dramatic, but they are!) I wanted a musical celebrating the resurrection of Jesus Christ with the symphony and in a theatre not a church...i want the community to be able to take ownership of this event and have this be a beacon of light - also more and more churches are doing less at Easter, so i really believed it would fill a void. People I told the idea to seemed to love the concept and seemed to want to be a part of it. Well...the community spoke loudly by NOT buying tickets in droves...So we were left with no option but to cut out losses and cancel the show. Now this blog is not to call out for sympathy, nor is it a time for me to complain and whine about things not going my way. Just the exact opposite. I do not want to focus on the disappointment, but rather the response to this disappointment. I cannot change what has happened. I can learn from it. I can take away good ideas and choose to not make the same mistakes...and I can figure that out. let me tell you as story...a memory...a time when I felt like this was being taught to me... I would often walk home by myself from school as a young boy. I can still see the image clearly - walking along the sidewalk praying and thinking. I read the story of David a lot as a boy and thought of the life he lead. I remember being so intrigued by one thing God said about David. God called David a man after HIS own heart. I would think about the life David lead...the mistakes he made and would try to make sense of that. I would then look around my family, my friends, my church and those in leadership around me and i can remember thinking, how many of these men and women are described as David was by God - and how many have made some of the same mistakes... As I walked home as a boy, I believe God was revealing this statement of truth to me. I thought this, "God doesn't care as much about what we do on a daily basis - He already knows we will mess up - But HE is far more interested in our response to it" I remember most of the adults in my life wanted to clarify the message I felt that I was getting from God - they wanted to make sure that i knew God did not like sin and that He does care deeply about our sin and it grieves His heart etc...They seemed to always want to make sure that HIS GRACE did not become too "top of mind", but that the "do's & don't's" took centre stage!!! Now, if you ask them today - they will all say that is not what they meant...I do believe that as well. Their intention was not to focus on do's and don'ts...but the result of their focus was just that. I hope i am being clear...I do want to live a life that is without sin. I do want my motives and my actions to be blameless before God. I DO!! But, the reality of my life is that I am in need of His grace more and more! Just when i feel as though I conquer one sin...i find another!! If I spend my days in remorse and regret, i will never recover... If I spend my days looking at my past failures as a man, a musician, a father, and a Christ-follower...i will live and wallow in self-pity and discouragement. TODAY...i choose to take that 6 year old boys revelation from God to heart. I choose today, to look at how I can respond to disappointment and hurt, and find a way to not let it happen again...and also turn that emotion into grace filled optimism. I do not want the blows that life brings to take away my joy, and to distract me from the goals I believe God has birthed in me. So how do I repsond to disappointment?...What disappointment? Have a great day... Kevin

6 comments:

Babybloomr said...

Beautifully and honestly expressed, Kevin. Disillusionment and disappointment are my two LEAST favorite emotions, but as you point out, life is full of both. I do believe that our response to the circumstances we find ourselves in is where the rubber meets the road as far as our faith is concerned.

Anonymous said...

well spoken and expressed, Kevin. and certainly very challenging. seems to be a lot of disappointment or discouragement these days and you have challenged me to evaluate how I respond. thanks! Sandi

Anonymous said...

Sorry about the cancellation. I feel people celebrate Christmas big and forget or barely celebrate Easter or forget that Easter is just as important or even more important. Christmas...Jesus comes to save us. Easter....Jesus saves us. Even though the concert has been cancelled, you still have that amazing gift God gave you and you could make a single on how important and awesome Jesus and Easter is. I know I would buy it.....hugs Brenda

Unknown said...

I'm so sorry to hear that your Easter Celebration has been cancelled. Do not take this as a sign that you are not well received as a musician. You have immense talent and a beautiful voice and heart , so don't doubt that for a moment. I'm sure Wendy and your children will readily attest that you are a wonderful husband and father. I believe that everything happens for a reason, a lesson or is just part of a greater plan you are not privy to yet. Have faith that your success in life is not measured by how many tickets sold at a concert.

The slogan for the RCAF is "Per Ardua Ad Astra" which translates to "through adversity to the stars!" I believe that adversity brings strength, commitment and success. Ask any great achiever how many times they failed before they succeeded...their failures will likely far outweigh their successes, but they can tell you 1000 ways how not to do something.

Pray for insight, work hard, stay humble and praise the Lord!

Rudy

Maureen Lowndes Smith said...

Hi Kevin. Thanks for your very honest and real blog. I had the privilege and honour to be front row at your concert with Russ Taff in St. Catharine's and you truly have a God given talent but even greater than that, you carry a very heavy anointing when you sing. As I said to you on Sunday, I heard other voices sing along side of you and Russ that night, it was so glorious and you both sounded so amazing together. When 1 door closes, another 1 opens. Always remember that Kevin. You are very much loved, you are God's champion. Never forget that!! Happy Easter! Love and blessings in Christ, Maureen Lowndes Smith

Sherrill K said...

My dear dear friend, I love your honesty and I love you. What a challenge to all of us to respond the problems and frustrations and disappointments in life, in a Christ like way. I admit I struggle with that too often. Thanks for taking time to share.