Saying GoodBye to 2015...or is it good riddance...

2015 started with such promise. My business was getting a "fresh start", new working relationships, new partnerships and I actually needed to wear shades as the future did in fact look very bright...THEN...all hell broke loose. I don't think I am exaggerating when I suggest that everything I had dreamed of for this fiscal year - died! I do not want to rehash the details, but lets just say that every single projection, every single goal, every single financial "dream" - was obliterated!! I think that sums up my 2015... Now I could sit here and think of the craziness that was 2015. I could sit here and blame and finger point and pretend I am a victim and that life is so unfair and life is harsh yada yada yada...I could be sad, and sit here and be depressed because of the situation I find myself in...OR...I could find the many blessings in the rubble. I choose to find those blessings...here are just a few: 1. We finally took a family vacation. Wendy has been saving for a couple years without telling anyone. She surprised us last Christmas with a trip to Cuba for us and the 3 kids! AWESOME time!!! 2. I had the chance to tour with all 3 of my vocal heroes. Growing up, Steve Archer, Russ Taff and Michael English were the 3 singers that I pattern'd my vocal style after. I knew all their music, I knew their special "vocal lyks". I toured with all 3 and got to sing some of their iconic tunes with them. I sang, "Through His Eyes of Love" & "Jesus is the Answer" with Steve Archer..."I'm Forgiven" & "Trumpet of Jesus" with Russ Taff...then just last week, "Mary Did You Know" "I Bowed of My Knees" & "I Believe in a Hill" with Michael English!!! So...that was VERY cool. 3. Our company helped Jessica Ridley tour in the UK for 18 dates with Ward Thomas (#1 Country act in the UK) and I was able to spend 8 days in the UK and see many incredible things! I even saw Stonehenge! 4. I was able to release my very first DVD, THE SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS WITH KEVIN PAULS & FRIENDS, featuring - The Martins, Steve Archer, NewWorldSon, Jacob Moon, Alynthia, Kevin Ramessar and a great band and choir!! It played all over the UK this year, into the US Market and parts of Australia and South Africa. This is a huge deal for me...so happy about this! 5. My daughter Lauren - is engaged!!! Getting married next year...She is also finishing up school and is a youth pastor at a local church in Waterloo. 6. My daughter Amber is at Bible College and just got back from a 6 week missions trip to Jamaica. She is also an amazing photographer. 7. My son Jordan is done high school and is taking his Real Estate course and will be joining my brother in Hamilton to keep the tradition going and work for PAULS Real Estate! 8. My lovely wife, Wendy, and I celebrated our 27th Anniversary this year. AND we still really like each other! SO...??? I can focus on the negative of 2015 --- OR, I can choose to see the blessings. I have learned many things this year. I know who my friends are. I know that there are many people that like to see others fail. I also know that there are many people that see the good - and there are many people that have the ability to show grace and mercy! Here is what I hope for in 2016. A) I will be back touring a lot more B) I will be back working with artists a lot more C) I will have my wife working by my side! D) I have a renewed focus for the few things in this world I am good at. STICK TO THEM! E) I will write new music this year, with some great songwriters I am so happy to be turning the calendar over to 2016. Not so much to get rid of 2015...but to look forward to another year to be better - professionally - and personally! God be the centre of all I do. May people see YOU before they see me. Happy New Year!!! See you on the road in 2016. Kevin

27 Years and Counting...

So today I celebrate 27 years of marriage to my best friend. I have always loved Wendy, and I have always wanted to be a good husband. I have failed MANY TIMES! I have not always been what I need to be. I have fallen short on more than one occasion (shocker to most!! LOL). If I take time to look back over the 27 years...there have been dark times...times when I wasn't sure what was ahead...times when I was not "happy", and times when I wished I had responded very different. When people see us today...27 years into this marriage - and we are truly VERY happy - they tend to think that, "the road was just "easy" for them." I have made many mistakes that could have cost me this relationship. I have responded in ways that I am sure caused Wendy to think life would be "easier" or better without me. I have been so close to running away and leaving it at times. But after 27 years...and all the valleys and mountain top experiences...I still woke up today and chose WENDY! Wendy and I really want to write a book and tell our story. We feel so incredibly blessed and fortunate to have the relationship we do have. We have 3 incredible kids and we all like to hang out. In spite of the many times I could have lost it, and in spite of the many times I deserved to be kicked aside...through it all...my marriage stays intact. I am so grateful. I truly feel honoured to be the husband of Wendy Pauls. I truly feel proud to be the father of Lauren, Amber and Jordan. I have wonderful friends and a great family that helped pave the way and walk with us through tough times...I am so far from perfect or deserving and I sure didn't earn my lovely wife. Hard work, forgiveness and a lot of prayer got us through. Wendy has made me a better person. I am not the man I was when she married me, and I hope there are more rough edges to carve away. I love who she has helped me become. I look forward to the next 27 years!!! Thank you Wendy Pauls...I truly am madly in love with you!! August 5th, 1988 was a good day!! Kevin Pauls www.kevinpauls.com

How do you respond to disappointment?

Well, I know it has been a long time...I must keep this blog up. Sorry for my distance. I seem to turn to this when things in my life start to unravel. I cling to this form of therapy when i feel discouraged or have some trial that hits my family or my career. This is one of those times again... I have loved the whole Kevin Pauls & Friends at Christmas time in Kitchener...this is starting to become a "thing", something people are looking forward to and I am hoping to actually not lose money this year!! LOL...But, I have always dreamed of Christmas & Easter...I wanted to make an impact in my community surrounding the 2 biggest days on the calendar...and the 2 biggest events in the history of the world (not trying to be dramatic, but they are!) I wanted a musical celebrating the resurrection of Jesus Christ with the symphony and in a theatre not a church...i want the community to be able to take ownership of this event and have this be a beacon of light - also more and more churches are doing less at Easter, so i really believed it would fill a void. People I told the idea to seemed to love the concept and seemed to want to be a part of it. Well...the community spoke loudly by NOT buying tickets in droves...So we were left with no option but to cut out losses and cancel the show. Now this blog is not to call out for sympathy, nor is it a time for me to complain and whine about things not going my way. Just the exact opposite. I do not want to focus on the disappointment, but rather the response to this disappointment. I cannot change what has happened. I can learn from it. I can take away good ideas and choose to not make the same mistakes...and I can figure that out. let me tell you as story...a memory...a time when I felt like this was being taught to me... I would often walk home by myself from school as a young boy. I can still see the image clearly - walking along the sidewalk praying and thinking. I read the story of David a lot as a boy and thought of the life he lead. I remember being so intrigued by one thing God said about David. God called David a man after HIS own heart. I would think about the life David lead...the mistakes he made and would try to make sense of that. I would then look around my family, my friends, my church and those in leadership around me and i can remember thinking, how many of these men and women are described as David was by God - and how many have made some of the same mistakes... As I walked home as a boy, I believe God was revealing this statement of truth to me. I thought this, "God doesn't care as much about what we do on a daily basis - He already knows we will mess up - But HE is far more interested in our response to it" I remember most of the adults in my life wanted to clarify the message I felt that I was getting from God - they wanted to make sure that i knew God did not like sin and that He does care deeply about our sin and it grieves His heart etc...They seemed to always want to make sure that HIS GRACE did not become too "top of mind", but that the "do's & don't's" took centre stage!!! Now, if you ask them today - they will all say that is not what they meant...I do believe that as well. Their intention was not to focus on do's and don'ts...but the result of their focus was just that. I hope i am being clear...I do want to live a life that is without sin. I do want my motives and my actions to be blameless before God. I DO!! But, the reality of my life is that I am in need of His grace more and more! Just when i feel as though I conquer one sin...i find another!! If I spend my days in remorse and regret, i will never recover... If I spend my days looking at my past failures as a man, a musician, a father, and a Christ-follower...i will live and wallow in self-pity and discouragement. TODAY...i choose to take that 6 year old boys revelation from God to heart. I choose today, to look at how I can respond to disappointment and hurt, and find a way to not let it happen again...and also turn that emotion into grace filled optimism. I do not want the blows that life brings to take away my joy, and to distract me from the goals I believe God has birthed in me. So how do I repsond to disappointment?...What disappointment? Have a great day... Kevin