Inside OUT...

good morning...this is our 25th Valentines Day together. 25 times that we have had the opportunity to say I Love You! 25 times that the day has dictated we say, I Love You...I really like Valentines Day! I haven't always performed well...some years I totally blew it and others I went over board as if to make up for lost time. This year i went pretty traditional. Saturday I went out in the morning and bought a dozen roses. My wife still loves flowers. We decided that we would do dinner and a movie tonight and just have a relaxed time together. No big expectation, but simple signs of our love and the fact that we still like to be together!!

Now, Valentines Day has not always been a huge priority because I try and make as many days as possible "I Love You" days! BUT - there is something special about a public day, that begs us to act out in a loving way. So I embrace that today and publicly say I LOVE YOU to the most wonderful women I could have ever married. I am glad that we are life partners...Wendy Pauls - You are my Valentine!

The interesting thing is that I have daily tried to make this relationship work. It was not always perfect and it still is not perfect...BUT - I do remember praying many days..."God, let me love Wendy more today than yesterday..." I prayed that for years. I prayed that I would continue to love her like we were newlyweds! I saw a lot of people after 20 plus years just living with someone...not passionate anymore, not really happy - just living with them!! YUCK! I did not want to be 50 - empty nest and alone with my spouse and say - honey, this is boring!!! SO - I have worked at loving my wife with everything I have...(I have fallen short far more than I have hit the mark by the way...) BUT I have tried and that has paid off.

So - this last Sunday at the Meeting House (our church) the pastor Tim Day was preaching the final message on the topic Inside Out...Real Change. "Be transformed by the renewing of your mind" - kinda change! This type of change does not happen all of a sudden. I realized the correlation of this kind of change to my marriage. A good marriage does not happen over night...it is a process! Real change is a process...

We cannot view God as a microwave of change. He does not normally zap someone and they instantly become free of all their "stuff". Often this is a LONG process...it is driven by US!!! This "renewing of our minds" is deep stuff. it is not as simple as "Lord, I want to be better...Help me!" This is a daily process of laying down our will, seeking His and applying it. Making decisions that lead us closer to His way of thinking. I am trying to lose weight...this is a moment by moment struggle - decision after decision - choosing the right foods...not tempting myself by sitting in front of a Krispy Kreme and hoping God will reduce my cravings!!

I have some of the same issues that plague me today, that plagued me 20 years ago...WHY? I think it is because my thinking has not changed. I have been asking for symptoms to be removed, and when they are not I simply give up!

I need to transformed by the renewing of my mind!!! What I put into my mind dictates what will come out of it...What I watch, what I read, where I spend my time...what I ponder...

If I think loving thoughts towards Wendy - I seem to find it easier to love her. If I think sinful thoughts, negative thoughts...put inappropriate images into my head...interestingly I do not feel like loving God's way...My mind is not transformed...

I am going to work hard at changing my patterns...changing the things that I can, and than allowing God to work on my heart!

This Valentines Day I want to work towards a renewed mind! Start changing my thought patterns, my reading patterns...If you do the same thing expecting a different result...well you know!

"Be transformed by the renewing of your MIND!!" I am excited to start this journey again...I love knowing that my God is the God of 2nd chances...over and over and over!!

Love your spouse, Love your God...and LOVE those around you!!!

Happy Valentines Day!

Kevin

PS - Check out a new LOVE song that will be on the upcoming CD "Missing You To Death"

be transformed by the renewing of your mind?

WOW - have you ever thought about that statement. Romans is full of those types of statements. (Romans is a book in the New Testament of the Holy Bible...just in case!!)

Be transformed - what does this really mean? Say a prayer of "salvation" and zap!! ALL IS GOOD!! after all we are saved by Grace are we not?? (that is a completely separate topic - look at the book of James! - another book in the NT!!)

What does it mean to be transformed...by the renewing of the mind? I was thinking about this today, and thinking about my situation and my life and wondering what this really means.

I see how incredibly important thoughts are. The Bible talks about holding your thoughts captive. Taking stock in your thought-life. What are you thinking about? Do you live in fear...are you paranoid? Do you think that God is on your side? Do you fear that bad things will happen? Are you in a constant state of battling negativity? What holds your thoughts?

If we ask ourselves the tough questions about our thought-life I think we start to understand why God says that we need to be transformed by the renewing of our mind!! Maybe I am the only one that struggles with my thought-life! Maybe I am the only one that thinks very bad things about people that cut me off on the 401. Maybe I am the only one that thinks inappropriate thoughts, maybe i am the only one that has temptations to not claim all my income...maybe I am the only one that says...no one will see me? Maybe I am the only one that says...I can ask for forgiveness!! Maybe I am the only one that thinks is it OK to think those bad thoughts about someone and linger there and draw it out and even think about how I could get revenge!! Yeah REVENGE!! There's a positive thought!! I travel a lot by myself...there is a thought battle!

I am far too human, and I know the struggle that goes on in the mind...so i totally relate to the book of Romans when it says be transformed by the renewing of the mind!!!!

Now before you beat yourself up...There was a reason I wanted to talk about this today. I had a thought that I believe came from the Lord...

Here it is: As far as the battle for the mind is concerned, I have been trying so hard to empty myself of SELF. Trying to rid myself of pride, selfish thoughts, selfish motivations...SELF! The more I battled and removed those things from my life, I have a very frustrating problem!! IT COMES BACK!!!! Here is an example of what it feels like. I am in the middle of a field with a bucket of water and it is pouring rain!! I keep emptying the bucket of water and then i keep coming back to it five minutes later and it is full again...I empty the bucket and it fills up again...i have never taken the bucket out of the rain...I can empty it, but unless I take the bucket OUT of the rain and fill it with something else...the water will always come back to the bucket...

SO - to completely transform my life...and renew my mind, I must stop focusing on the emptying process and start focusing on the FILLING PROCESS!!! FILL my life with God's word, fill my life and my day with prayer and conversation with God. Keep my mind "stayed" on THEE! Pray without ceasing...keep the communication lines open with God...Study the WORD...

Pretty soon, the bucket will be so full of other "stuff" that water will no longer be able to gather and will run away from the bucket!! Pretty soon, you will not have to try to empty the bucket from your SELF, but you will need a bigger bucket to contain all the goodness the LORD wants to supply for us...

I have known this for years...TODAY I feel that God has truly shown me this to be true in my own life! Thank you God for being so patient with me...

Talk to you soon,

Kevin