Inside OUT...

good morning...this is our 25th Valentines Day together. 25 times that we have had the opportunity to say I Love You! 25 times that the day has dictated we say, I Love You...I really like Valentines Day! I haven't always performed well...some years I totally blew it and others I went over board as if to make up for lost time. This year i went pretty traditional. Saturday I went out in the morning and bought a dozen roses. My wife still loves flowers. We decided that we would do dinner and a movie tonight and just have a relaxed time together. No big expectation, but simple signs of our love and the fact that we still like to be together!!

Now, Valentines Day has not always been a huge priority because I try and make as many days as possible "I Love You" days! BUT - there is something special about a public day, that begs us to act out in a loving way. So I embrace that today and publicly say I LOVE YOU to the most wonderful women I could have ever married. I am glad that we are life partners...Wendy Pauls - You are my Valentine!

The interesting thing is that I have daily tried to make this relationship work. It was not always perfect and it still is not perfect...BUT - I do remember praying many days..."God, let me love Wendy more today than yesterday..." I prayed that for years. I prayed that I would continue to love her like we were newlyweds! I saw a lot of people after 20 plus years just living with someone...not passionate anymore, not really happy - just living with them!! YUCK! I did not want to be 50 - empty nest and alone with my spouse and say - honey, this is boring!!! SO - I have worked at loving my wife with everything I have...(I have fallen short far more than I have hit the mark by the way...) BUT I have tried and that has paid off.

So - this last Sunday at the Meeting House (our church) the pastor Tim Day was preaching the final message on the topic Inside Out...Real Change. "Be transformed by the renewing of your mind" - kinda change! This type of change does not happen all of a sudden. I realized the correlation of this kind of change to my marriage. A good marriage does not happen over night...it is a process! Real change is a process...

We cannot view God as a microwave of change. He does not normally zap someone and they instantly become free of all their "stuff". Often this is a LONG process...it is driven by US!!! This "renewing of our minds" is deep stuff. it is not as simple as "Lord, I want to be better...Help me!" This is a daily process of laying down our will, seeking His and applying it. Making decisions that lead us closer to His way of thinking. I am trying to lose weight...this is a moment by moment struggle - decision after decision - choosing the right foods...not tempting myself by sitting in front of a Krispy Kreme and hoping God will reduce my cravings!!

I have some of the same issues that plague me today, that plagued me 20 years ago...WHY? I think it is because my thinking has not changed. I have been asking for symptoms to be removed, and when they are not I simply give up!

I need to transformed by the renewing of my mind!!! What I put into my mind dictates what will come out of it...What I watch, what I read, where I spend my time...what I ponder...

If I think loving thoughts towards Wendy - I seem to find it easier to love her. If I think sinful thoughts, negative thoughts...put inappropriate images into my head...interestingly I do not feel like loving God's way...My mind is not transformed...

I am going to work hard at changing my patterns...changing the things that I can, and than allowing God to work on my heart!

This Valentines Day I want to work towards a renewed mind! Start changing my thought patterns, my reading patterns...If you do the same thing expecting a different result...well you know!

"Be transformed by the renewing of your MIND!!" I am excited to start this journey again...I love knowing that my God is the God of 2nd chances...over and over and over!!

Love your spouse, Love your God...and LOVE those around you!!!

Happy Valentines Day!

Kevin

PS - Check out a new LOVE song that will be on the upcoming CD "Missing You To Death"

New Year...New Hopes and New Dreams!!

2011 came way too fast...I was just getting use to saying 2010 and now I need to get use to a new year! Our lives get so complex and scattered it is really hard to believe that time goes by SO FAST!! Because of this, I am trying hard to put into practice the statement on the bottom of my email..."relentlessly remove hurry from your life..."

I just finished reading a book called CRAZY LOVE!! goto www.crazylovebook.com - It will ROCK your world!! It has mine! I really recommend this book to anyone that has a desire to know God and to understand the TRUE meaning of what Jesus called us to. We have...at least I have, not been a good example of what Christ called us to in the scriptures. I have taken His sayings and found ways to make them mean something else, just so they would fit better with my lifestyle! I am currently working on a new world view...a new personal and spiritual paradigm. I am challenged like never before to look at the way I view "stuff", the way I view the poor, the way I view hardship (and even how I define hardship!)

The more gadgets I have in my life, the easier life gets...the harder it is to hear the voice of God and to really believe that what He said was true...We block out certain things because of what that truth will cause us to do. If we really believe the things Christ said - and take them to heart...they will cause a response!! Sometimes that is scary!!

CRAZY LOVE is the best book I have read in a long time...I am not a big reader, but I could not put this down...two 3 hour sessions and the book was done. I could not put it down!!!

SIMPLIFY your life...FOCUS on others as much as yourself...GIVE radically...allow yourself to be OBSESSED with Jesus.

WOW - when you look at what those statements say...on the surface, I am ok with them. When you dig a little deeper and start to uncover what they mean, and how they cause us to act - they are far bigger than I have ever felt before.

I am in the process of growing my music business, trying to sing and perform well, trying to help others do the same...I want to earn a living to support my family...I want to win a Grammy one day - HOW DO I DO ALL THAT IN LIGHT OF THIS REALITY!??? That is what I am working through even as I write this!!

This is not a one size fits all...God calls us each to follow Him in our own individual way...I desperately want to live radically and find out what this new paradigm will mean for me and my family!! I haven't been this excited in a long time!!

read the book - watch some of his videos...and lets journey this together!!

Kevin